Weekend Ramblings S1E1B

Weekend Ramblings S1E1B

Welcome to the other side >:D

Here I intend to go a little more in depth about my early life crisis with a bit more waffle.

So! Tomorrow I get my baby back! One truly doesn’t know what one has until it’s gone, and I mean that in the most ambiguous way possible.

My laptop has been in a continuous restart loop since mid August and a friend from church has offered to fix it free of charge, touch your neighbour and say “thank God for friends.”

I’ve never been so excited to type on a keyboard, my own keyboard, in my life.

I think I downloaded some virus onto it while trying to get a free editing software, I was about to become a YouTuber *insert sarcastic smile emoji*. And I tried to fix it myself but it wouldn’t even let me wipe the whole distin, so I passed it on to an expert so I could move on with my life.

Anywho, I had to break this post into two because I had actually recorded a 20 minute video about how I feel like I’m at the midpoint of my life where I’m expected to be an adult but I haven’t finished being a kid yet.

As far as I know, I’m a very observant person, and I am also quite aware of myself in most situations. My recent observations have brought me to the conclusion that it’s time for me to step out of my comfort zone so I can grow and mature a little.

As a younger girl, I was SUPER energetic and very sociable. Then I went into the washing machine that we refer to as university and became a bit more introverted. My friends will tell you, the idea of speaking to someone new or being left alone in any environment would cause me to literally panic – my most comment symptom would be prickly armpits.

I don’t know why I shared this part of my uni experience but I diverge, I think the way I behave sometimes gives new people a first impression that I am really silly, ditzy and airheaded. Although I do have my moments where I show these characteristics, I assure you, there is some depth to who I am as a person.

I’m not even going to get into it, if only I had a better choice of clothing I would’ve just uploaded the video anyhow but I’ll put it into one sentence:

I feel like I have to change myself to be treated how I’d like to be treated.

How would I like to be treated, you ask?

Like an adult, like someone who can make the right decisions, like someone who knows how to lead well, like someone who’s ideas and decisions are respected and like someone who is dependable and reliable.

Why must I change, you ask?

Because I feel like if I show too much of my fun, silly, ditzy and just all-around great side to any and everyone – I’ll get treated anyhow, like a child. And I’m sique n tiyad, sis. This includes how I’m treated by my loved ones (but with them I get it, I’m the baby of the family and that’s what I’ll always be to them, I accept that now), by my work colleagues and even sometimes people from church.

The trend here is that they’re all older than me. So sometimes I feel like they’re justified in the way they, for lack of better words, patronise me from time to time, but I also feel like they don’t give me a chance to show myself as Irene the adult.

However, I take 100% responsibility for the fact that I make dumb decisions sometimes but how will I learn from them if I don’t? It’s not everything in life that you can teach someone, sometimes they have to experience it to learn.

On top of this, I also feel like I need to educate myself more on current affairs and social issues etc etc but that’s a work in progress, I’ve got the BBC News app now and I’m learning to not ignore the notifications, we’re getting somewhere at least, right? I’m transitioning from a proverbial girl to a proverbs woman but with all the 21st century trimmings. It’s character development. Like Whitley Gilbert from A Different World, in fact exactly like her. Love life and all.

Maybe one day I’ll retake the video in a better choice of clothing so you’ll understand. If I don’t, and you’re really intrigued as to what I’m waffling about, feel free to ask me, my door is open 24/7 for females and until 10pm for males.

Anyway, that’s that about that. So until next time.

Peace and love,

Irene

xo

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